


Never Truly Gone

by idrilhadhafang



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Canon Divergence - Post-Star Wars: The Last Jedi, Conflicted Poe Dameron, Drunk Kylo Ren, Eventual Happy Ending, Heavy Drinking, Innuendo, Kylo Ren Redemption, Kylo Ren in Love, Love Confessions, Love/Hate, M/M, Sad Kylo Ren, Supreme Leader Armitage Hux
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-18
Updated: 2019-06-17
Packaged: 2020-05-13 22:20:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 785
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19260280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idrilhadhafang/pseuds/idrilhadhafang
Summary: Kylo’s redemption starts in an unexpected way.





	Never Truly Gone

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing.
> 
> Author’s Notes: Call this a thing that was too big for trope bingo. Again.

He’d lost everything. Even as he nursed his glass of Corellian ale, former Supreme Leader Kylo Ren couldn’t help but feel it. Lost it all, and to whom, Hux? Hux wasn’t even worthy of the title of Supreme Leader, he never was.

It was on the fourth or fifth glass of ale that Kylo heard footsteps. He looked, and that was when he saw Poe. He couldn’t say he was even defensive at this point. He just wondered why a beautiful man like Poe was in a dive like this.

Poe came towards him, and that was when Kylo spoke. “ ‘Lo, Poe.”

Poe’s brows furrowed in that moment. “Are you drunk?”

”So what if I am?” Kylo said. He hiccuped; something through the haze of his drunkenness already felt embarrassed to have done it in front of Poe. “I’ve got...nothin’ left. You happy? You have everythin’, and I have nothin’. The punishment fits the crime.”

Poe stared at him with a mixture of confusion and pity. Great. Pity. Just what he needed. 

“What the hell happened?”

”Hux. The bastard threw me out.”

Poe’s face seemed to go through a multitude of different expressions, from serves-you-right to we’re-doomed, and Kylo found that they all...well, they all looked very pretty on him. 

“You’re a very pretty man,” Kylo said. “The prettiest-est...est.”

”That’s not a word.” Poe said.

”Should be.” Kylo took another long gulp of his drink and belched. “Kriff, you’re perfect. I’m nothing next to you. Less than nothin’; the girl was nothin’ and she was still better than me.” A hiccup. “On the scale of nothin’, I’m just the lowest of the low.”

Another furrow of Poe’s brow. 

Kylo continued. “You’re too Light for me. Even when I broke your mind like...like  _snap._ Not like the pilot, but you know...”

He reached towards Poe, but Poe caught him before he could fall out of his chair. Hard. Even with that look of disgust in his eyes, Kylo wanted to kiss him. 

“You’re so kriffing beautiful,” Kylo said. “Even when you hate me.”

Poe looked tired in that moment. “I don’t hate you,” he said.

”I can’t hate you either, Poe. Kriff...I could marry you...”

Poe looked flabbergasted. Then, “Come with me. You can sleep on my ship.”

”Are you trying to seduce me?” Kylo said.

”If I was, it wouldn’t be when you’re drunk.”

”I’m not drunk. I’ve just...drunk things. Corellian things. You should try ‘em, they’re good...”

”Someone’s got to get you to the ship.”

***

Poe could swear that the alcohol was making Kylo’s mouth go a mile a minute. He talked at length about how beautiful Poe was, how the sun caught his black hair and how he wanted to worship Poe’s tummy. “It’s so soft and cute...”

Okay, Kylo had to be very, very drunk. “It happens,” Poe said. “I...guess it’s what happens when you get older.”

Kylo laughed, a little unhinged. “You could be fat as a Hutt and you’d be perfect. So beautiful. So kind. So funny and caring. And that...thing you do with the ship.” A beat. “I love you, Poe. I love you.”

”Kylo, shhhh. You’re drunk.” Kylo couldn’t possibly love him. 

“No, I...I love you. I’ve always loved you, I wanna marry you. Please...I’ll be your slave, Poe, I am your slave...I can’t be without you, it hurts so much...”

Sweet stars, how much did Kylo have to drink? And why couldn’t he have told Poe this when he was still Ben Solo, without alcohol? Poe could have loved him back. 

“Why did you hurt me?” he said.

”Snoke made me. Hurt me. I’m sorry, Poe...” 

They got in the ship. BB-8 exclaimed in surprise as Poe entered with Kylo in tow. 

“Fire up the ship, buddy,” Poe said. “I’ve got to get our former Supreme Leader to bed.”

”Y’know, you don’t have to seduce me...”

”Not like that,” Poe snapped.

He got Kylo to bed and draped the covers over him. “I love you, Poe,” Kylo said. “I love you so much more than I could ever love myself.”

”We’ll talk about this in the morning.”

Even as Kylo fell asleep, Poe couldn’t help but feel things that refused to coalesce into one thing. 

Kylo loved him. Somehow, he always had. What would have been welcome coming from Ben Solo sounded wrong coming from Kylo Ren. Poe could still remember how Kylo had ripped his mind open, and yet all sorts of sweet nonsense things had come out of Kylo’s mouth. 

And though he hated Kylo Ren, he couldn’t be without Ben Solo.

Poe sighed. Maybe sleep could help resolve his conflicted mind. Maybe...maybe...


End file.
